Week 52: "Not What You Do, But It's The Journey"

Week 52:
"Not What You Do, But It's The Journey"

So it comes down to this, week 52.  Its an amazing feeling to get to the end and completing this amzaing journey.  This final blog work was a journey, not just for myself but for those who helped me to create this work.  Last night on New Years Eve, I asked my guests of the End of Year/End of Blog Party to each paint something, anything that their own creative minds came up with. Then I went in after and brought their works together.  The one major thing I have begun to understand is just like my guests, its not what you do, but it's the journey that you take.

Throughout this entire year I dug deep into myself to create my life onto canvas; mentally exposing myself as I went through my life.  What I learned is with every canvas, with every brush stroke, is that life is not a destination or a completion, but a journey that changes with each step.  Each step along carries me to another and another.  The biggest leason I have learned during this journey is that it doesn't matter what I paint, or what mistakes I make on the canvas of life.  As long as I take that mistakes and make something beautiful with it I have learned the biggest leason of life.





Final Thoughts for "52 in 52":
This moment finally has come, the end of this path and onto the next.  This blog and journey has changed me and my life forever.  When I decided take on this series I wanted to try to grow as an artist, but in turn it made me grow as a person.  I will be forever changed emotionally in how I live life and look at things.  On the way I found a little more self-love, self-acceptance and self-worth. 

Destinations on the path that we take in life will change with each step, but the most important thing is to sit back and enjoy and grow on the journey. 

Thank you to for everyone's support and to all those who have helpped in making this series a success artistically and personally.  Now time for "A New Journey".

Week 51: "Freedom"



This work is on Canvas board, it needs to be framed to be hung.

 Week 51: "Freedom"

During this time of year we can all get caught up in the hussle and bussle of the holiday season, but end up loosing sight of all the good things that we have.  We begin to look at the negative of what we didn't get, or that pair of socks and underwear that we received from grandma.  For me this year I am trying to make sure that I don't forget what truly is a gift, a freedom of self.

Over the last year I have really dealt with alot of issues that run rampant.  I tried to break free of the bondage of my own cage of character defects. I have found a sense of exhileration in breaking those binds of self.  With each step I make I reach and gravitate towards lightness of soul.  At times I have found myself even falling in love with myself and the person I have become.  I have come to truly see myself as a gift to myself. 

For most of my life I have been one to always feel like my self worth is based on what others want me to feel, but the day I painted this blog I truly took a step in another direction.  The importance of a the day was for me and me alone.  I did not mind that some people in my life didn't recognize it.  Each day in my life I have to always remember that I am a gift and I must treat myself as one.  In that I find true freedom within my soul.

Note to readers:

I can not believe there is just one more painting left.  It is an amazing feeling to have accomplished this.  Without you, my readers and supporters, I would not have gone on this amazing journey of self re-discovery.  Thank you, much love, and Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.

David K.

Week 50: "From the Mountain"



This work is on Canvas Board, it doesnt need to be stretched but must be framed to be hung.



Week 50: "From the Mountain"

With every journey in life there is always an end. Soon my journey with this series will be complete, but then where do I go from here?  That is the question on my mind, especially after the entire year of struggling and searching for growth. What is the next step?  What will that next step lead to?

When we journey over a great climb or accomplish a great task there is a sense of pride that leaves us satisfied for a moment. Yet when the feeling of satisfaction dissipates we long for it again.  We let our desire for growth and movement forward drive us toward the next  journey. 

I am coming down the mountain to the end, looking back at what I have done, and then turning to see the new journey in front of me.  It is clear and clean, and open to whatever my mind desires.  I allow my feet and my desire of growth and movement move me away from my journeys of the past toward the new.

Week 49: "In Between Negative and Silence"



This piece is on Canvas Board. Needs framed to be hung.
















Week 49: "In Between Negative and Silence"

Over the past week, as I start to realize that another year is soon to go by, I have been quieter than normal.  The people around me know that I can talk, and always have something to say, but recently I have had this want to be silent.  In a world of go go go, and always wanting to have voices heard, I find people think that silence means that you're being negative, or in a depression. My question is where is the line that separates negativity and silence.

Recently I have had the desire not to speak, but to listen.  Listening for what, I am not sure.  I have found myself not wanting to say anything or speak, but to start to listen to myself and the world around.  Religious men and women take vows of silence as a way to connect with the world that has gone mad with noise polution.  Yet when someone outside of that realm decides to live in silence, for even a brief moment of time, people become uneasy or feel the need to force vocal diarrhea from them.  Is it their own insecurity of silence?  For me I am begining to learn that for my life to grow I need to just sit and be silent.  The only issue for me is that I must watch closely to not cross the line into the darkness. 

Many say that silence is golden, but I find that silence is in between all colors and no color at all.

Week 48: "For Home the Bell Tolls"

This work is on Canvas board. It will not need to be stretched but will need to be framed to be hung

Week 48: "For Home the Bell Tolls"

So this week I took some time learning to be with me, myself and I.  It is a very difficult concept for me to understand.  Recently I moved into my own place for the first time in my 30 years of life.  After living with loved ones for so many years, which help drown out the voices in my own head, I have to learn how to deal with memories of times passed.  Whether it is a movie, the smell of something cooking or an object, I find these memories ring in my head like the sound of a bell tower in the distance. 

During this time of year many of my thoughts lead me to traditions and family, which for me are a safe place.  Yet this year I am on my own, staring out into an unknown world and an unknown path.  Placing ornaments on a tree, or putting on a long lost scarf given to me by someone special, cause memories to rush over me.  I know that I must not live in the past, but at times the creature of habit rears it's dark head and pulls me back.

As I step out into the unknown path that is my new journey I must remember the memories of the past, but let them be a sound of the a bell tower in the distance, and not morter and brick that keep me stationary.

Week 47: "Dream in Colors"



This work is on Canvas Board, it doesnt need stretched but needs framed to be hung.




Week 47: "Dream in Colors"

I sat with my head resting today and as I started to sleep I began to slowly slip into a dream.  Light started to come through the darkness in my mind.  Greens and teals swirled while dancing white lights filled in the middle.   Many times in my life I had colors in my dream, but it was always dark.  When I awoke I questioned the meaning.  Do the colors that we dream in tell us what is store for us or does it represent where we are in our lives?

Green to me is the color of the Earth, renewal and growth.  In my life lately I have found that I have grown.  After a long time of just living life on cruise control I started to have moments of clarity.  Of course I didn't come to this easily.  Coasting through life I began to be aware of my own growth, like a plant in too small of a pot.  Is this a sign for me to start looking at repotting myself in my life, to begin to renew my thinking in my life so that I may grow?

When you dream, what color do you see?

Week 46: "The Mourner of Ones that are Lost"

Week 46: The Mourner of Ones that are Lost"



This work is not on normal canvas, but canvas board.  This piece will not need stretched, but will need framed.



The death of a love one is extremely hard and takes time to heal.  What about ones that have moved on or are lost in their own demons.  With the loss of someone so close we have to go through, our own mourning cycle.  

As many know I have been given the amazing gift of recovery, yet I meet many on a daily basis that still struggle.  Tonight, before painting live at an art show I found out that a close friend that I care for and love decided to listen to his demons and disappear into the depth of addiction once again.  When I see and hear about these things it cuts deep.  The hurt of watching someone I care about so much give up on himself rips through me.   This grief process of knowing someone is gone from my life gives me a quick kick in the stomach, but I must move on. 

The thing I have to do is hope that the friends that are lost may return to me someday.  I have learned to except the fact that I they may never return.  I must focus the anger and the fear towards the inner demons and not the friend.  I know that when the darkness doesn't have its grip on them that is where my friend still exists.  For I know them, they were me and if I am not diligent it could be me. 

So I weep in silence for those in my life that are lost.  I shed a tear for every one that have come into and silently slipped back out.  I mourn the loss of my friends, but have the love to move on to new friends with open arms.